Are you crumbling under the burden of providing the “perfect” homeschool experience for your children? Do you lie awake at night evaluating your performance each day and finding that you just don’t measure up to your own expectations?
In the summer of 2018, I found myself in that very place. So much so, that I decided I was not up for the task of educating my last two children. I was tired. I had been doing this for 14 years and I deserved a break. I had graduated two amazing boys! I was not the same young, energetic, fun mom anymore. I was frustrated, failing, and exhausted. I caved and put their names on the list for the local charter school. It broke my heart.
As the months passed it was becoming clear they were not going to get in. Their “lottery” numbers were too high. Now what Lord? I just CAN’T do one more year of homeschool. I prayed that my children would get into the Charter School, I prayed that He would change my heart.
That’s when my friend Amanda, from my support group recommended, “Teaching from Rest” by Sarah Mackenzie. My heart was so far from homeschooling, I didn’t even want to invest the $15 to buy the book. I waited for it from the library for weeks. During those weeks, the Lord had already started softening my heart and reminding me of the reasons I started this journey in the first place.
When the book arrived from the library, I devoured it. It’s a light read, less than 100 pages. I quickly ordered my own copy because I knew this would be something I would want to read again and again. As soon as my own copy arrived, I started reading it for a second time. I pulled out my bullet journal that had been collecting dust on a shelf for months and took notes. The quotes from the book were things I wanted to post all over the house. The Lord used this book to fill my sails, pour truth into my soul and give me unshakable peace.
“Rest begins with acceptance and surrender.” – Sarah Mackenzie
The funny thing is, once I had determined to continue homeschooling, I found out that one of my children had been accepted to the Charter School, meaning the other wouldn’t be far behind. God has a sense of humor. He did answer my prayer. He changed my heart and gave me what I had pleaded for! It wasn’t even a temptation. I declined that offer as soon as it arrived.
“It’s faithfulness He wants…” – Sarah Mackenzie
This summer, do yourself and your family a favor and read this book. While you are taking a break from schooling your children, pour into yourself so you will have something to give when the next school year rolls around.
Pray with me this prayer of St. Augustine I found in the book:
“Ineffable Creator, who, from the treasures of your wisdom have established three hierarchies of angels… You are proclaimed the true font of light and wisdom, and the primal origin raised high beyond all things. Pour forth a ray of your brightness into the darkened places of my mind; disperse from my soul the twofold darkness into which I was born: sin and ignorance… grant to me keenness of mind, capacity to remember, skill in learning, subtlety to interpret, and eloquence in speech. May You guide the beginning of my work, direct its progress and bring it to completion. You who are true God and true man, who live and reign, world without end. Amen.”
Have you read Teaching From Rest? What book has changed your homeschool journey?